First Week of School

So the first week of class has passed already.
There were so many things happened that i really do not know where to begin with.

Slowly and gradually, you would realize God is all you need when God is all you've got.
The past week was intense, tiring, and spiritually packed.

how do you really hold on to His hands and don't let go in the midst of trials?

How do you really trust when every situation that you are in is challenging and hard to trust?

How do you realize He is the source of everything when everything seems to against you?

How do you continue to love when everything is so unlovable and you feel unloved?

How

Since grace of God is so great. then can we continue to sin then?

No:)

I reviewed my devos and notes and have these thoughts

There is no doubt that in Christ we have infinite forgiveness for every sin, Jesus did it on the cross to forgive our sins, once and for all. He did so "according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished upon you"-- Eph 1:8

" In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding. And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment-- to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ"  ( Eph 1:7-10)

We cannot sin beyond God's grace, because where sin abounds, grace super-abounds 

" but where sin increased, grace increased all the more, so that just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord" ( Rom. 5:20)

You are forgiven for every sin--past, present, and future, You will never be condemned by God or seperated from Him ( Rom. 8:1-2,31-39)

However, many might ask, if God's grace is that great, can we continue to sin then?

In 2 Tim,  it is said that 

" Everyone who confesses the name of Lord must turn from wickedness" ( 2 Tim 19)

and God called us to to live a Holy life-- "not because what we have done but becuase of his own purpose and grace. " ( 2 Tim 8)

There are only two kind of slaves in this world, slave to sin or slave to God. 

" But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. ( Rom 6:22-23)

Roman 6:15

God calls us to put on the wedding garment

Thank you Heavenly Dad for a new day!!!!

Today, you show me more about what is it mean by the Kingdom of Heaven.

1. Faith ( Luke 13:18)
2. Forgiveness ( Matt 18:23)
3. Power ( 1 Corin 4:20)
4. Within me ( Luke 17:21)
5. Treasure ( Matt 13:45)
6. Follow Christ ( Matt 19:21)
7. Humility ( Matt 20:28)
8. Righteousness ( Matt 21:31)

I come across these two scriptures even though i don't really understand yet i believe that You will show me and teach me through your spirit. 

" The stone the builders rejected has become the capstone; the Lord has done this and it's marvelous in our eyes. He who falls on this stone will be broken to pieces, but he on whom it falls will be crushed" ( Matt 21:42)

The stone that the builders rejected = Jesus

Those who fall on Jesus will be broken by truth-- no longer live by themselves

But those who don't fall on Jesus/truth , then when the wrath of God comes, they will be crushed.

• A person may be broken with repentence as a result of falling on Christ.
• A person refused to repent, the result is judgement

" For many are invited, but few are chosen" ( Matt 22:14)

• Many are invited, few come
• Many come, but few are chosen
• To me, i think there are two steps to be chosen

1. when called, follow
2. when follow, put on a garment ( obeying and following Christ

The wedding garment is all that matters--- many are called by God and respond by consecrating to righteous living. They receive John's baptism, but, like the Ephesian and the Hebrews at that time, they are not baptized into Christ. they have not put on Christ. therefore it is important to put on the wedding garment( Christ) 

Two days in Museums

In these two days, i went to two museums, Museum of Modern Art and Hispanic Society of Americas. I had to pay $12 to go into the Museum of Modern Art while Hispanic Society of Americas was free of charge. Yesterday, I spent more than 5 hours in Museum of Modern Art. I was glad that i did not get lost in finding its location. It was pretty nice, with six floors. I pretty liked it even though it was not as impressive as i thought it would be, given the fact that I had to pay $12 dollars to go inside... anyway. Here are some pictures, haha, there was even a person who played the piano from the back of it.

 

 It was freezing cold and i even got a headache after being out for that long. After visiting the Museum of Modern Art, I went to Time Sqaure .

Today i went to Hispanic Society of Americas. It was located at W 153 St Broadway. In the museum, there are a lot of sculptures and a couple floors of pictures


It wasn't that bad since it was a free museum. After the museum, i wandered on the street. there was a stunning number of Hispanic shops in this area. I even got the chance to practice my spanish!! hahah. After that i went to a couple 99 C stores and i was always very joyful whenever i went into those stores because the stuff over there are always so cheap!!!:))

I need you

Dear God, I just want to tell you that I need you so much. More than anything else in this universe.

some fear

I am so freaking scared today somehow by an email from a professor.... arghhh so scared still. I was email to a professor in regard to a class that i want to get into. however, since i was not able to get a hold of him, i was trying to contact some other faculty members who may be able to help me out with my class schedule. may be it goes back again to the limitation in written communication... I emailed Dr. Nowek, whom i think is the head of the department about how hard it is to contact some instructors. then the instructor kinda scolded me in the email, saying that i should not be expecting instructor's email that soon especially during vacation... but actually i was referring to another email which i sent couple weeks ago. somehow i don't know why but i am always so scared of professors... due to past experience...

Transformation

After all of these travelling, I finally arrived at Aunt and Uncle's place. How true and faithful God's promises are as He shows me through delay and people throughout the last five days.

Thanks:

I want to thank God for listening my prayers that i finally be able to arrive Kansas City safely after all the snow storms and hindrance. While I felt such a strong force in stopping me to go to Kansas City, somehow God just lead me all the way through.

• Thank you for Wendy's hospitality, she is one the most hospitable person that I have even seen. She can really let people to feel like home.
• Thank you God for speaking to heart through people and speaker.

Highlight:

Undoubtedly, in this trip, I have experienced God's great love and promises first time in this half year. Seriously, I really don't know where to start from. This past week God has consistently been showing me things that always blew my mind off.

I have had some really good talks with Aubrey. It is always good to see old friends again. We went to Boiler Room together, as well as IHOP together. We have had some really good fellowship together.

The second day after the conference was over, a group of people from Wisconsin ( Joann, Katie, Dayn, Hui, and Anthony) went to ice-skating near Crown Plaza. it was freezing cold but amazingly fun. Katie, I dont' know why, that she paid for all of us.... we had a lot of fun and took a lot of pictures.

After ice-skating and went back home, they suddenly prayed for and prayed with me. Throughout the prayer, I felt His tenderness, His grace, and His love. I have never had " all for me" feeling for such a long time that people are praying for me earnestly. To me, it's just too hard to believe that's true. The first day after the conference, I briefly shared about where I am at recently spiritually. I had a lot and a lot of questions about God. I don't know where I am going, why I am where i am. What I can see right now, I am just so withdrawn from familarity. No one knows me and I know nobody. Even on top of my head i know that He is near but yet He seems so distant. My heart is always so anxious in knowing how I am going to fit in God's story when many surround me have had already done a lot of great things for God. Even though I know that I should not compare, but yet it's hard not to compare. My heart is wrestling with God i would say but I am just don't understand what God is doing.

But it's so great that God just uses a lot of different individuals to speak to my heart, so affirming and so powerful. While i feel so blessed while Wendy and Dayn were praying for me, I can really feel the presence of Holy Spirit over me, protecting and covering me. And i shared about how restless I am putting me best in establishing friendship yet the friendship After Wendy and Dayn have left, Katie, Aubrey, Hui, and me stayed behind talking. And I talked about how incomprehensible i feel about God in not letting me to greater things. Instead, He puts me in position like cleaning toilet, washing toilet. Why my parents do not connect me to people that would help me grow spiritually. While i don't know and cannot see the big pictures, God sends people like Katie in my life, affirming me so much that " My life is gonna be so exciting, i am even more anointed by God then many worship leaders; I am going to be so powerful so that's why Satin tried to put me down; I am going to be a great influence but IT IS JUST NOT TIME YET. you have been the last for a while and now it is about time for you to be the first.

My heart is super burdened, i dont even know if that's the right word to say. but it's just super awesome, it is crazy how a random person from Wisconsin ( out of 25000 people in the whole conference) met someone from Hong Kong, saying something that is soo affirming directly to my heart. God, you are just too Good.

Thank You Lord from Aubrey that I am able to see her in this trip.

Lord, show me more how to trust in You. If the word you said to me is true, please show me God. Show me you are the provider, Show me that my life is going to be awesome, show me that you are the source of everything, show me that you are FOR ME, show me that you have CHOSEN ME.